Question 1: I want to achieve my dreams but I feel lazy & stuck!
Okay, So I feel stuck. Like literature stuck in every aspect of my life. There are so many things I want to do and achieve but I just am unable to turn my wants into realities. Even though I know that this is my hands because see Allah SWT gives us opportunities instead of the direct things. I feel like I’m missing those opportunities. My entire circle is at some point in their lives. They’re achieving their goals and even though I’m so happy for them and I want every single person to succeed, I feel bad about myself. There are some things I want to achieve, the path I’m moving on will not help me achieve it. This means I need a massive shift in my life which requires dedication but I’m too lazy for that. I lack that dedicated motivation and this I swear is super annoying.
Answer:
I know EXACTLY how you feel because I was facing the same thing in a way and still do sometimes, to be honest, so you are not alone. Before anything dear, I want you to remember first that:
1- MAKE DUA TO ALLAH (SWT) TO HELP YOU AND GIVE YOU STRENGTH
2- IT IS NEVER TOO LATE TO START
3- IT IS EASIER THAN YOU THINK INSHALLAH
4- IT IS 100% NORMAL TO FEEL BAD ABOUT YOURSELF SOMETIMES BUT THE IMPORTANT THING IS HOW TO GE OUT OF IT
First step: I think that you are not lazy, you are actually afraid. You are afraid of maybe failing, judgment from certain people, or something of that sort. Therefore, I encourage you to sit with yourself and see what exactly you are afraid of. Because I promise you whatever fears we have in our heads are 100 times magnified than the reality.
For example, fear would look like this: you start something but then fail and you start imagining people looking at you and talking about you because you failed
Reality: you fail at something and then you learn from it and start again because the truth is no one would notice like you notice things about yourself.
Second Step: Start with tiny steps, don’t overwhelm yourself. Say for example you want to start a website. Take a whole day just reading things online about starting a website and don’t do anything else. Then the next day, take another baby step. That way your work is accumulating without overwhelming yourself.
Third step: Don’t listen to your negative thoughts, trust me you will start telling yourself things like:” Come on, you are not good enough, give up already”. You will never reach your goal, you are too lazy”
Believe each and every one of us has these thoughts every single day, know you are not alone. Allah (SWT) is with you, so replace these thoughts with positive ones.
Most importantly, do it because you enjoy it and have fun with each step don’t only worry about the final outcome.
Fourth step: DO NOT COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS. This is a very crucial step because comparing drains your energy and makes you feel inferior to everybody else. This is NOT true, the reality is you’re comparing your worst state to their best.
I hope this helps you dear in any way inshAllah. Just take today to address your fears and as I mentioned one step at a time.
Peace be upon you,
Ruba–Inspired by Aisha
